Once Upon a Time in Mexico

Movie Scripts

Barillo I wasn’t. Gracias maestro. Sit, please. So, you’re the man that brought us the mariachi.

Cucuy The man I work for, Mr. Sands, he is using the mariachi to kill General Marquez.

Barillo So, you want to join us? Here’s how it works. There’s the bait, there’s the trade. A favour for a favour.

Cucuy So El Mariachi is the trade.

Barillo You are.

Chambers This ain’t my line of work.

Man 1 Ahí viene el General Marquez. (Here it comes the General Marquez)

Man 2 Traigan al Mariachi. (Bring the Mariachi)

Elle No te mate porque ya había demasiada sangre derramada, pero estoy viendo que la sangre va a brotar otra vez. (I didn’t kill you before because too much blood was spilled, but now, I think blood will appear again.)

Soldier General Marquez, el mariachi no estÃ¡ aquí. Se escapó. (General Marquez, el Mariachi is not here. He escaped)

Marquez Tú tambiÃ©n te vas a escapar. (You are going to escape too)

Fideo Hey, hey, hey, Lorri. Why?

Lorenzo Practice shooting, not drinking. Bueno.

Elle We’re on.

Man Por orden del presidente tienen que revisar cualquier coche que pase, por armas o drogas. (The president order to check every vehicle, we are looking for guns or drugs.)

Chambers You know that fucker’s been blockading all the goddamn roads.

Barillo Take us back another way. By order of the president. Who does this guy think he is? He wants to get rid of me? Fine. I’ll get rid of him. Replace him even. Then, I will simply, disappear. VÃ¡monos ya. (Let’s go now)

Chambers Si vÃ¡monos man. (Yeah, let’s go man)

Barillo Don’t put me out completely. Have my men wait outside.

Ramirez Gracias. Barillo and Dr. Givarah must all ready be inside of the building. . . having entered through the back or basement. They should be mid-procedure. AFN agents. This is going down now. If Barillo wanted to look, unrecognizable to authorities, he succeeded. Massive tissue loss due to an only, partially completed facial reconstruction, wasn’t necessarily the cause of death. They switched bodies. Barillo.

Ajedrez FBI. He was, anyway. Bring him along.

Sands Listen. I cannot do everything by myself, I need someone to go in there with me. No, I lost my inside man, probably dead. And Cucuy, greedy turd that he is, ratted me out and has disappeared. Plus, I’m pretty sure the cartel are shadowing me. No, listen, I have got a swell bunch of guys intercepting Marquez’s army, but they’ve got no guns. Now, listen, I want you to understand me. This is no time to screw the pooch, because this is supposed to be the big dance number. All right? Hello? Hello? Are you there? Okay. Okay, I’m going to freak right out. I would like the puerco pil-bil, and a tequila with lime. Yeah, listen, er, I need a new line. This one’s been compromised. Okay. Thank you. I’ll be waiting here at the La Voca Volando. That’s right, the flying, cow.

Ajedrez Sheldon. You really didn’t see it coming, did you? Sorry, baby. I told you I wasn’t interested in your schemes. Too small.

Sands Oh. My Christ. Is that Barillo?

Ajedrez That’s the new Barillo. The old Barillo died in surgery a few hours ago.

Sands What kind of cartel would have you running its operation?

Ajedrez I’m his daughter.

Barillo You’ve been spying on my operation for some time.

Sands I feel it’s only fair to warn you, that killing me is crossing the line, and you will have every single marine from here to Guantanamo Bay up your keister, mister. So, just know that.

Barillo Fortunately for you, nothing you did, is worth dying over. But you have only seen too much. We want to make sure that doesn’t happen again.

President En este el día de muertos, yo les vengo a ofrecer una nueva vida, una vida llena de… (In this Day of the dead, I offer you a new life, a life full of …) That sounded a little extreme for a parade.

Aide Those are troops coming up from the south, sir.

President Whose?

Aide Emiliar Marquez.

President Wh. . . what do we do?

Aide We stay here. This place is fortified. It’s much easier to defend this place than to chance going out in the open.

President What are you talking about, fortified? Come here! (Speaks in Mexican)

Aide Just stay clear of those windows, sir. You let me handle it.

Sands My name is Sheldon Geoffrey Sands. I work for the Central Intelligence Agency. I throw shapes. I throw shapes. I set them up. I watch them fall. I’m living la vida loca.

Boy Quiere mÃ¡s chicle? (Do you want more bubble gum?)

Sands No. I’m terribly sorry about your chewing gum, but, listen. . . I will give you this. . . ouch. . . if you’ll be my eyes.

Boy Es un dólar. (It’s a dollar)

Sands Well, I meant, this. I need you to take me to the centre of the city.

Boy Alguien te viene siguiendo? (Somebody is following you?)

Sands Well, it’s a little difficult for me to tell right now, because I’m kind of having a bad day. Do you see somebody?

Boy Un tipo. Se estÃ¡ acercando. (A man, he is getting closer)

Sands Okay. Okay. Listen, have you ever seen one of these?

Boy Si.

Sands Ever used one?

Boy No.

Sands Don’t ever, because they’re very, very bad. But right now, what I need for you to do, is to aim this at the bad man that’s following us. . . and shoot him in the head.

Boy Matarlo? (Kill him?)

Sands Oh, yeah. Very martalo. Close?

Boy Si.

Sands Okay. Smoke him. Smoke the fucker. Send him straight to fucking Broadway.

Boy No puedo. (I can’t)

Sands What?

Boy No puedo. (I can’t)

Sands Fuck it. Come here. Right or left?

Boy Derecha. (Right)

Sands Was that my right, or your right?

Boy Mi derecha. (My right) Hombre equivocado. (Wrong man)

Sands Sorry. Look me in the eyes. . . and then kill me.

Boy Ten. (Here)

Sands Oh, good boy. Now you’re thinking. Take me to the centre of the city where there will be even more dough.

Elle Por ti, por nuestra hija, por Mexico. (For you, For our daughter, for Mexico) In my past, I’d take a little from the bottom, now I realize, start from the top. The president is a. . . is a good man. I’ll go around back. Meet me in five.

Ajedrez Vigilenlo. (Watch him)

Man 1 Podríamos torturarlo. (We could torture him)

Man 2 Es del FBI. (Is from de FBI)

Man 1 No, ya estÃ¡ retirado, eso no cuenta. (No, he is retired, that doesn’t count)

Man 2 A mi me torturaron una vez y no me gusto. Y sabes una cosa cabrón, me chingaron el huevo izquierdo. Y que crees, se me aguitaron todas las ideas. (They tortured me once and I didn’t like it. You know, they cut me the left nut. And what do you think, my ideas just disappear.)

Man 2 En la comida lo discutimos. (We discuss it at dinner)

Man 1 Okay.

Man 2 Y tu Blanca Nieves, cuida a ese pinche cochino. (And you Snow White, match this idiot)

Lorenzo Just stay low, they’ll leave us alone.

Fideo Ah.

Lorenzo What the fuck?

Fideo I don’t like military.

Taxi driver Get out.

Sands Why are we stopping?

Taxi driver We can’t go any further.

Sands W. . . Why. . . Why not?

Taxi driver Look out there, it’s a fucking coup d’etat.