Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
used with courtesey of Daily Script
FEAR & LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS
by
Terry Gilliam & Toy Grisoni
BLACK SCREEN
A desert wind moans sadly. From somewhere within the wind comes the tinkly, syrupy-sweet sounds of the Lennon Sisters singing “My Favorite Things.” A series of sepia images of anti-war protests from the mid-sixties appear one after another on the screen.
In the violently scrawled style of Ralph Steadman, the title FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS splashes onto the screen. A beat, and then it runs down and off revealing:
TITLE: “He who makes a beast of himself Gets rid of the pain Of being a man.” Dr. Johnson
The VOICE OF HUNTER S. THOMPSON — a.k.a. RAOUL DUKE:
DUKE (V/O) We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
A red Chevy convertible — THE RED SHARK — wipes the black screen.
EXT. ON THE ROAD TO LAS VEGAS – DAY
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
THE RED SHARK races down the desert highway at a hundred miles an hour. THE STONES’ “Sympathy For the Devil” blares.
AT THE WHEEL
STRANGELY STILL AND TENSE, RAOUL DUKE DRIVES — SKELETAL, BEER IN HAND — STARES STRAIGHT AHEAD.
BESIDE HIM, FACE TURNED TO THE SUN, EYES CLOSED BEHIND WRAPAROUND SPANISH SUNGLASSES, IS HIS SWARTHY AND UNNERVINGLY UNPREDICTABLE ATTORNEY, DR. GONZO.
The music pounds DUKE stares straight ahead. GONZO froths up a can of beer – uses it as shaving foam.
DUKE (V/O) I remember saying something like: “I feel a bit lightheaded. Maybe you should drive…”
GONZO starts shaving. 2.
DUKE (V/O) Suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car…
Close on DUKE — shadows flutter across his face. The
reflections of bats swirl within his eyes. We push in close to one eye ball — SCREECHING SWIRLING BAT-LIKE SHAPES!
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
DUKE (V/O) … and a voice was screaming: Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?
CUT TO WIDE SHOT OF CAR –
DUKE, eyes rigid, flails at the air. No bats anywhere. GONZO casually looks over…
GONZO What are you yelling about?
DUCK SCREECHES to the side of the road. The sudden wrench makes GONZO nick his face with his razor.
DUKE Never mind. It’s your turn to drive.
DUKE (V/O) No point mentioning these bats. I thought. The poor bastard will see them soon enough.
DUKE hops out of the car, keeping an eye out for bats, frantically opens the trunk to reveal what looks like A MOBILE POLICE NARCOTICS LAB. DUKE desperately rifles through the impressive stash.
DUKE (V/O) We had two bags of grass, seventy- five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, a whole galaxy of multi- colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers… Also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls. 3.
DUKE, eyes darting madly as he hears what sounds like the SHRIEKS OF BATS returning, grabs an assortment along with another six-pack of beer – slams the trunk shut and dives back into the car.
DUKE (V/O) Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.
THE RED SHARK RACES INTO THE DISTANCE… on the ground, weakly flapping is a SEMI-SQUASHED, SLOWLY DYING ANIMAL… A BAT?
EXT. FURTHER DOWN THE ROAD TO LAS VEGAS – DAY
IN THE RED SHARK
GONZO grips the wheel – stares maniacally down the road – a lousy driver.
DUKE (V/O) The only thing that really worried me was the ether. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge. And I knew we’d get into that rotten stuff pretty soon.
The radio news wars with “SYMPATHY FOR THE DEVIL” on a tape recorder.
RADIO NEWS An overdose of heroin was listed as the official cause of death for pretty 19 year old Diane Hanby whose body was found stuffed in a refrigerator last week…
GONZO changes the station – “ONE TOKE OVER THE LINE, SWEET JESUS, ONE TOKE OVER THE LINE” vies with “SYMPATHY”… He sings along – washes a couple of pills back with a new beer. The RED SHARK fishtails.
GONZO “One toke over the line, sweet Jesus.” 4.
DUKE (muttering to himself) One toke. You poor fool. Wait till you see those goddamn bats.
UP AHEAD – AT THE SIDE OF THE DESERTED ROAD
A LONE HITCHHIKER spots them, jumps up and sticks out a thumb. The RED SHARK roars past. Then, fifty yards down the road…
GONZO Let’s give that boy a lift.
GONZO wrenches the wheel – THE RED SHARK swerves to the side of the road.
DUKE We can’t stop here – this is bat country!
GONZO JAMS THE CAR INTO REVERSE AND ROCKETS BACKWARDS. The HITCHHIKER races to the car. A poor OKIE KID with a big grin.
HITCHHIKER Hot damn! I never rode in a convertible before!
Then the big grin freezes on the OKIE KID’s face at the sight of: DUKE and GONZO looking out at him with HYPER- NORMAL, shit-eating SMILES.
DUKE Is that right? Well, I guess you’re about ready, eh?
The HITCHHIKER hesitates.
GONZO We’re your friends. We’re not like the others.
DUKE (hissing sharply) No more of that talk or I’ll put the leeches on you.
DUKE turns back to the HITCHHIKER – smiles reassuringly.
EXT. EVEN FURTHER DOWN THE ROAD TO LAS VEGAS – DAY
The HITCHHIKER sits nervously in the back seat as the RED SHARK screams down the road. 5.
GONZO sings along to the tape player.
The HITCHHIKER’s eyes go to the door – considers jumping out and taking his chances.
DUKE, sweating bullets, STARES AT THE HITCHHIKER in the rear view mirror.
DUKE (V/O) How long could we maintain, I wondered. How long before one of us starts raving and jabbering at this boy? What will he think then? This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family.
The HITCHHIKER’s eyes notice a thin line of blood trickling down GONZO’s neck.
DUKE (V/O) Would he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car?
DUKE’s mouth moves intermittently – sometimes in sync with the words, sometimes not.
DUKE (V/O) If so – well, we’ll just have to cut his head off and bury him somewhere. Because it goes without saying that we can’t turn him loose. He’d report us at once to some kind of outback Nazi law enforcement agency, and they’ll run us down like dogs…
DUKE (out loud to himself) Jesus! Did I say that?
DUKE (V/O) Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?
GONZO (reassuringly to HITCHHIKER) It’s okay. He’s admiring the shape of your skull.
DUKE gives the HITCHHIKER a FINE BIG GRIN and the HITCHHIKER giggles nervously. 6.
DUKE (V/O) Maybe I better have a chat with this boy I thought. Perhaps if I explain things, he’ll rest easy…
DUKE (roaring over the road noise) THERE’S ONE THING YOU SHOULD PROBABLY UNDERSTAND —
The HITCHHIKER stares at him, not blinking.
DUKE (yells) CAN YOU HEAR ME?
The HITCHHIKER nods — giggles — terrified. DUKE climbs into the back seat.
DUKE That’s good. Because I want you to have all the background. This is a very ominous assignment — with overtones of extreme personal danger. I’m a Doctor of Journalism! This is important, goddamnit! This is a true story!… (WHACKS the BACK OF THE DRIVER’S SEAT with his fist)
The CAR SWERVES SICKENINGLY, then straightens out.
GONZO (screams) Keep your hands off my fucking neck!
The HITCHHIKER makes a sudden lunge for freedom. DUKE GRABS HIM BACK DOWN.
DUKE (V/O) Our vibrations were getting nasty — but why? Was there no communication in this car? Had we deteriorated to the level of dumb beasts?
The HITCHHIKER STRUGGLES IN PANIC. 7.
DUKE (to HITCHHIKER)
I want you to understand that this man at the wheel is my attorney! He’s not just some dingbat I found on the Strip. He’s a foreigner. I think he’s probably Samoan. But it doesn’t matter, does it? Are you prejudiced?
HITCHHIKER Hell, no!
DUKE I didn’t think so. Because in spite of his race, this man is extremely valuable to me. Hell, I forgot all about this beer. You want one? (HITCHHIKER shakes his head) How about some ether?
HITCHHIKER What?
DUKE Never mind. Let’s get right to the heart of this thing. Twenty-four hours ago we were sitting in the Pogo Lounge of the Beverly Wills Hotel…
INT. THE BEVERLY WILLS HOTEL POGO LOUNGE 1971 – DAY
A uniformed DWARF, carries a shockingly PINK TELEPHONE through the glittering, tranquil POGO LOUNGE CROWD. They are the ELOI. HENDRIX AFROS and DROOPING MUSTACHES and BELL BOTTOMS and LOVE BEADS and BELLS. ACTRESSES sip Singapore Slings and PROMOTERS sip ACTRESSES in this MONIED, SANITISED VERSION OF THE GREAT REVOLUTION YEARS.
DUKE (V/O) … in the patio section, of course, drinking Singapore Slings with mescal on the side, hiding from the brutish realities of this foul year of Our Lord, 1971.
The DWARF reaches DUKE — T-shirt, levis, sneakers and shades. GONZO — white rayon bellbottoms and a khaki tank top undershirt. They are in the middle of a serious conversation. 8.
DUKE I’m telling you, the Salazar story is getting too complicated. The weasels have started closing in.
The DWARF sneers.
DWARF Perhaps this is the call you’ve been waiting for all this time, sir…
DUKE lifts the receiver — listens…
DUKE Uh-huh… Uh-huh… Uh-huh…
DUKE hangs up the PHONE with the DEAD-PAN EXPRESSION OF A MOVIE SPY.
DWARF That was headquarters. They want me to go to Las Vegas at once and make contact with a Portuguese photographer named Lacerda. He’ll have the details. All I have to do is check into my sound proof suite and he’ll seek me out.
GONZO, says nothing for a moment, then POUNDS the table!
GONZO God hell! I think I see the pattern! This one sounds like real trouble! You’re going to need plenty of legal advice before this thing is over. As your attorney I must advise you that you’ll need a very fast car with no top and after that, the cocaine. And then the tape recorder, for special music, and some Acapulco shirts… (GONZO tucks his khaki undershirt into his white bellbottoms — he means business!) This blows my weekend, because naturally I’ll have to go with you — and we’ll have to arm ourselves. 9.
DUKE Why not? If a thing’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right.
DUKE and GONZO are up and off. The DWARF chases after them with the (very large) check in his hand.
They sweep out through the Lounge door, unaware of it swinging back into the face of the pursuing DWARF.
DUKE I tell you, my man. This is the American Dream in action! We’d be fools not to ride this strange torpedo all the way to the end.
GONZO Indeed. We must do it. What kind of story is this?
EXT. BEVERLY WILLS HOTEL – FRONT ENTRANCE – DAY
DUKE and GONZO emerge.
DUKE The Mint 400! The richest off-road race for motorcycles and dune- buggies in the history of organized sport! (handing parking ticket to Valet) — a fantastic spectacle in honor of some fatback grossero who owns the luxurious Mint Hotel in the heart of downtown Vegas… at least that’s what the press release says.
Their car arrives — rusted out, smashed door panels. They jump in.
DUKE We’re going to have to drum it up on our own. Pure Gonzo Journalism.
And they’re off in a cloud of black exhaust as the nose- bleeding DWARF stumbles out with the unpaid bill in his hand.
EXT. SUNSET BLVD – DAY
The PINTO races through shot.
DUKE (V/O) Getting hold of the drugs and shirts had been no problem… 10.
EXT. POLYNESIAN BAR – DAY
The PINTO skids to a halt outside Polynesian bar, the back window full of Hawaiian shirts.
DUKE (V/O CONT’D) … but the car and tape recorder were not easy things to round up at 6:30 on a Friday afternoon in Hollywood.
INT. POLYNESIAN BAR – DAY
TORN YELLOW PAGES with dealer’s ads ticked off lie in a pile as GONZO yells into a PAYPHONE. DUKE carries over four Singapore Slings.
GONZO O.K., O.K., yes. Hang onto it. We’ll be there in thirty minutes. (to DUKE — hand over the PHONE) I finally located a car with adequate horsepower and the proper coloring. (into PHONE) What?! OF COURSE the gentleman has a major credit card! Do you realize who the fuck you’re talking to?
DUKE Don’t take any guff from these swine. (GONZO slams the phone down) Now we need a sound store with the finest equipment. Nothing dinky. One of those new Belgian Heliowatts with a voice-activated shotgun mike, for picking up conversations in oncoming cars.
GONZO We won’t make the nut unless we have unlimited credit.
DUKE We will. You Samoans are all the same. You have no faith in the essential decency of the white man’s culture. 11.
EXT. SUNSET BLVD – DUSK
The PINTO races down street.
DUKE (V/O) The store was closed, but the salesman said he would wait, if we hurried…
EXT. SUNSET BLVD – TRAFFIC JAM – DUSK
They’re stuck in a traffic jam — clouds of exhaust. DUKE BANGS ON THE HORN IN FURY.
DUKE (V/O) But we were delayed en route when a Stingray in front of us killed a pedestrain.
Directly in front of them: BLOODY CARNAGE — a covered corpse is loaded into an ambulance by PARAMEDICS.
EXT. CAR RENTAL AGENCY – NIGHT
DUKE (V/O) We had trouble, again, at the car rental agency.
Behind the wheel of the RED SHARK: DUKE grins with satisfaction — checking it out. A nervous AGENT holds out a clipboard. DUKE signs without looking at the rental papers.
AGENT Say… uh… you fellas are going to be careful with this car, aren’t you?
DUKE Of course.
DUKE throws the car into reverse — roars backwards past the gas pumps to where GONZO is unloading their rusted out car.
AGENT Well, good god! You just backed over that two foot concrete abutment and you didn’t even slow down! Forty-five in reverse! And you barely missed the pump!
DUKE No harm done. I always test the transmission that way. The rear end. For stress factors. 12.
GONZO transfers boxes of new sound equipment and a large box of rum and ice into the RED SHARK.
AGENT Say. Are you fellows drinking?
DUKE Not me. We’re responsible people.
He JAMS the car into LOW GEAR and lurches into traffic. The AGENT runs into the street and helplessly watches them go.
GONZO There’s another worrier. He’s probably all cranked up on speed.
EXT. RUNDOWN BEACH HOUSE – NIGHT
STRANGE AND MAGICAL. In the moonlight: the silhouetted figures of DUKE and GONZO as they pack the RED SHARK.
DUKE (V/O) We spent the rest of that night rounding up materials and packing the car. Then we ate some mescaline and went swimming.
The surf crashes in the distance…
EXT. PACIFIC OCEAN – NIGHT
DUKE cries out as he dives into the ocean. He lets himself float up through the silvery bubbles…
DUKE AND GONZO FLOAT BEATIFICALLY IN THE GLOWING, SHIMMERING MOONLIT SURF.
DUKE (V/O) Our trip was different. It was to be a classic affirmation of everything right and true in the national character; a gross, physical salute to the fantastic possibilities of life in this country. But only for those with true grit…
EXT. AND EVEN FURTHER DOWN THE ROAD TO LAS VEGAS – DAY
DUKE’s intense face.
DUKE …and we’re chock full of that! 13.
GONZO Damn right!
DUKE My attorney understands this concept, despite his racial handicap. But do you?!
The HITCHHIKER nods — giggles — petrified.
DUKE (V/O) He said he understood, but I could see in his eyes that he didn’t. He was lying to me.
GONZO My heart!
GONZO clutches his heart. The car veers off the road and screeches to a halt. He slumps over the wheel.
GONZO (CONT’D) Where’s the medicine?
DUKE The medicine? Yes, it’s right here.
DUKE spills out 4 AMYL CAPSULES from a tin.
DUKE Don’t worry, this man has a bad heart… Angina Pectoris. But we have a cure for it.
DUKE and GONZO break 2 AMYLS apiece — INHALE DEEPLY. GONZO falls back on the seat, staring straight up at the sun. The HITCHHIKER looks petrified.
GONZO (suddenly flailing his naked arms at the sky) Turn up the fucking music! My heart feels like an alligator! Volume! Clarity! Bass! We must have bass! What’s wrong with us? Are you goddamn old ladies?
DUKE (turns up music to full volume) You scurvy shyster bastard! Watch your language! You’re talking to a Doctor of Journalism! 14.
GONZO (laughing uncontrollably) What the fuck are we doing out here? Somebody call the police! We need help!
DUKE (to HITCHHIKER) Pay no attention to this swine. He can’t handle the medicine. (he begins laughing)
GONZO (to the HITCHHIKER) The truth is we’re going to Vegas to croak a scag baron named Savage Henry. I’ve known him for years but he ripped us off — and you know what that means, right?
GONZO pulls out a .357 Magnum — waves it around.
GONZO (CONT’D) Savage Henry has cashed his check! We’re going to rip his lungs out!
DUKE And eat them! That bastard won’t get away with this! What’s going on in this country when a scum sucker like that can get away with sandbagging a Doctor of Journalism?
GONZO cracks ANOTHER AMYL.
The HITCHHIKER SCRAMBLES OUT OF THE CAR, DOWN THE TRUNK LID, AND FLEES.
HITCHHIKER Thanks for the ride. Thanks a lot. I like you guys. Don’t worry about me.
DUKE (yells) Wait a minute! Come back and have a beer!
The HITCHHIKER RUNS from car. 15.
GONZO Good riddance. That boy made me nervous. Did you see his eyes? (laughing) Jesus, this is good medicine.
DUKE glances back at the running HITCHHIKER.
DUKE (suddenly clambering into the front seat) Move over!! We have to get out of California before that kid finds a cop!
DUKE GUNS THE RED SHARK — TAKES OFF DOWN THE ROAD…
EXT. UNBELIEVABLY FAR DOWN THE ROAD TO LAS VEGAS – DAY
THE RED SHARK races — DUKE at the wheel — straight ahead driving.
DUKE (V/O) It was absolutely imperative that we get to the Mint Hotel before the deadline for press registration. Otherwise, we might have to pay for our suite.
GONZO wrestles with a shaker of COCAINE. The top comes off and the powder swirls away on the wind.
GONZO Oh, Jesus! Did you see what god just did to us?
DUKE God didn’t do that! You did it! You’re a fucking narcotics agent, that was our cocaine, you pig!
GONZO (waving his .357 Magnum at Duke) You better be careful. Plenty of vultures out here. They’ll pick your bones clean before morning.
DUKE You whore!
GONZO tears up a BLOTTER OF ACID. 16.
GONZO Here — chew this. It’s your half of the acid.
DUKE takes his half — chews it.
DUKE How long do I have?
GONZO Maybe thirty more minutes. As your attorney, I advise you to drive at top speed. It’ll be a goddamn miracle if we can get there before you turn into a wild animal. Are you ready for that? Checking into a Vegas hotel under a phony name with intent to commit capital fraud and a head full of acid.
DUKE (V/O) Thirty minutes. It was going to be very close.
The RED SHARK screams along the highway past a billboard: “DON’T GAMBLE WITH MARIJUANA! \ IN NEVADA: POSSESSION – 20 YEARS; SALE – LIFE!!”
EXT. LAS VEGAS MINT HOTEL – DUSK
The RED SHARK pulls up outside the MINT. A great banner spanning the street announces the MINT 400.
DUKE can feel the drug surging up inside him. Clutching a buckled beer can, sweat pouring, he stares fixedly at the TICKET the ATTENDANT gives him.
DUKE I need this, right?
ATTENDANT I’ll remember your face.
DUKE stares — losing it…
DUKE (V/O) There is no way of explaining the terror I felt.
INT. HOTEL LOBBY – DAY
DUKE waits in line at the front desk — RIGID WITH PENT UP ENERGY. GONZO’s ahead of him — muscling in — trying to queue jump and failing. 17.
DUKE (V/O) I was pouring sweat. My blood is too thick for Nevada. I’ve never been able to properly explain myself in this climate.
A COUPLE move off and DUKE jerks forward — stops — eyes fixed on the stony FEMALE RESERVATIONS CLERK.
DUKE (V/O CONT’D) Be quiet, be calm… name, rank, and press affiliation, nothing else…
DUKE moves ANOTHER RIGID STEP CLOSER to the desk — the tension almost snapping him in two. GONZO’s FLAPPING AROUND — absolutely no success.
Something catches DUKE’s eye… He REMAINS ROOTED — his eyes turning to the VEGETAL PAISLEY PATTERNS ON THE CARPET WHICH ARE SHIFTING — UNDULATING. THE CARPET PATTERNS ARE INEXORABLY CREEPING UP THE WALLS…
DUKE (V/O CONT’D) …ignore this terrible drug, pretend it’s not happening…
The LAST PEOPLE leave — with A FINAL, STIFF MOVE, DUKE comes face to face with the RESERVATIONS CLERK… AND EXPLODES!
DUKE HI THERE. MY NAME… AH, RAOUL DUKE… ON… ON THAT LIST, THAT’S FOR SURE. FREE LUNCH, FINAL WISDOM, TOTAL COVERAGE… WHY NOT? I HAVE MY ATTORNEY WITH ME, AND I REALIZE OF COURSE…
As DUKE stares at her, BABBLING, her FACE BEGINS TO MORPH. He tries to stop it happening by TALKING FASTER.
DUKE … THAT HIS NAME IS NOT ON THE LIST, BUT WE MUST HAVE THAT SUITE. YES. JUST CHECK THE LIST AND YOU’LL SEE. DON’T WORRY. WHAT’S THE SCORE HERE? WHAT’S NEXT?
DUKE sags — grips the desk — WHITE KNUCKLES. 18.
RESERVATIONS CLERK (hands him an envelope) Your suite’s not ready yet. But there’s somebody looking for you.
Her face is CHANGING — SWELLING — PULSING…
DUKE (shouts) NO! WHY? WE HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING YET!
The FACE OF THE RESERVATIONS CLERK TURNS GREEN & GROWS FANGS. DEADLY POISON! DUKE LUNGES BACK at GONZO, who GRIPS his arm intensely — REACHES OUT to take the ENVELOPE.
GONZO I can handle this. This man has a bad heart, but I have plenty of medicine. My name is Dr. Gonzo. Prepare our suite at once. We’ll be in the bar.
GONZO manoeuvres DUKE away from the desk. DUKE looks back — the RESERVATIONS CLERKS is now a MORAY EEL — green jowls and fangs.
INT. NAUTICAL BAR – DAY
The bar — OILY PEOPLE — quiet music — nautical theme. DUKE and GONZO at the bar, a marlin spike hanging on the wall behind them. DUKE has turned to stone…
GONZO (to the bartender) Two Cuba Libres with beer and mescal on the side. (opens the envelope) Who’s Lacerda, he’s waiting for us in a room on the twelfth floor?
DUKE Lacerda?
DUKE (V/O) I couldn’t remember. The name rang a bell, but I couldn’t concentrate. Terrible things were happening all around us…
DUKE is staring — RAPT — TERRIFIED. BLOOD FLOWS FREELY onto the floor. DUKE keeps his voice low. 19.
DUKE Order some golf shoes. Otherwise, we’ll never get out of this place alive. It’s impossible to walk in this muck — no footing at all…
DUKE looks up — GONZO has disappeared.
DUKE looks around him — the entire room has TRANSFORMED into a ROOM FILLED WITH REPTILES IN CLOTHES, DRINKING AND GNAWING AT ONE ANOTHER.
DUKE (V/O) I was right in the middle of a fucking reptile zoo. And somebody was giving booze to these goddamn things! It won’t be long before they tear us to shreds!
GONZO IS SUDDENLY BACK — AT DUKE’S SHOULDER.
GONZO If you think we’re in trouble now wait until you see what’s happening in the elevators.
GONZO removes his sunshades and we see he’s been crying… as he speaks he seems to be floating. Duke struggles to keep him in his line of vision.
GONZO I just went upstairs to see this man Lacerda. I told him I knew what he was up to… (GONZO rallies — turns fierce) He says he’s a photographer! But when I mentioned Savage Henry he freaked! He knows we’re onto him!
DUKE But what about our room? And the golf shoes?
A GROUP OF REPTILES AT A TABLE ACROSS THE ROOM stares at them, BLOOD DRIPPING FROM THEIR FANGS.
DUKE (CONT’D) (grabbing GONZO trying to hold him still) Holy shit! Look at that bunch over there! They’ve spotted us! 20.
Cut to wider shot — DUKE is holding on to a man standing
next to him at the bar. The room has returned to normality. GONZO is sitting in his original position.
GONZO (downs his drink — gets up) That’s the press table. Where you have to sign in for our credentials. Shit, let’s get it over with. You handle that, and I’ll check on the room.
DUKE No, no. Don’t leave me!
Black screen.
INT. MINT HOTEL SUITE – DUSK
A TELEVISION shows the NIGHTLY NEWS. A BUDDHIST MONK, protesting the war, sets himself on fire. A very nervous BELL BOY is laying out GONZO’s order. A marlin spike is on the floor next to DUKE.
BELL BOY Four club sandwiches, four shrimp cocktails.
DUKE There’s a big… machine in the sky… some kind of electric snake…
DUKE is curled by the window — MESMERIZED by an unseen neon sign outside the window. His eyes fill with a million colored lights.
BELL BOY … a quart of rum…
DUKE … coming straight at us.
GONZO Shoot it.
DUKE Not yet. I want to study its habits.
BELL BOY … and nine fresh grapefruit. 21.
GONZO Vitamin C. We’ll need all we can get.
GONZO sees the BELL BOY out the door — turns and lays into DUKE.
GONZO Look, you’ve got to stop this talk about snakes and leeches and lizards and that stuff. It’s making me sick!
DUKE stares — hears the drone of B52 BOMBERS…
On TV: The LAOS INVASION — A SERIES OF HORRIFYING DISASTERS — EXPLOSIONS AND TWISTED WRECKAGE.
Newsreel footage of MAI LAI MASSACRE and the LIEUTENANT CALLEY court-martial.
DUKE What are you talking about?
GONZO You bastard! They’ll never let us back in that place. I leave you alone for three minutes and you start waving that goddamn marlin spike around — yelling about reptiles! You scared the shit out of those people! They were ready to call the cops. Hell, the only reason they gave us press passes was to get you out of there…
A knock at the door. DUKE and GONZO break out in a sweat.
DUKE Oh my God! Who’s that?!
GONZO STICKS HIS GUN IN HIS WAISTBAND — opens the door to LACERDA — BOUNCING WITH PUPPY DOG ENTHUSIASM. GONZO stares at a man he instantly hates — watches him with deep suspicion.
LACERDA Duke? I’m Lacerda your photographer. Got your press passes? Good, good. Too bad you missed the bikes checking in. My, what a sight!
DUKE watches the B-52S DROP THEIR BOMB LOADS. 22.
Looking down to the thick, patterned carpet, DUKE sees the BOMBS EXPLODE like vicious flowers.
DUKE looks up: LACERDA is a war photographer — bruised, filthy and blood spattered. LACERDA approaches him — talking a foreign language.
LACERDA Husquavarnas. Yamahas. Kawaskis. Maicos. Pursang. Swedish Fireballs. Couple of Triumphs, here and there a CZ. All very fast. What a race it’s gonna be.
DUKE screws up his eyes — WILLS NORMALITY BACK. LACERDA is now just a keen photographer.L
LACERDA Well, we start at dawn. Get a good night’s sleep. I know I will.
And with a cheerful wave, he’s gone. DUKE is in shock.
DUKE (weakly) That’s good…
GONZO I think he’s lying to us. I could see it in his eyes.
DUKE (even weaker) They’ll probably have a big net for us when we show up.
DUKE’s attention returns to the devastation on the TV…
GONZO Turn that shit off!
GONZO kills the TV.
Black screen.
DUKE (V/O) Never lose sight of the primary responsibility. Cover the story. But what was the story? Nobody had bothered to say. 23.
EXT. DESERT – DAWN
Against A BIG ORANGE SUN, on a concrete slab, MEN FIRE SHOTGUNS into the dawn sky. Clay pigeons shatter. The Mint Gun Club.
Next to them, MOTORCYCLES REV — preparing for the MINT 400 RACE: A hundred BIKERS, MECHANICS and assorted MOTORSPORT TYPES milling around in the pit area; taping headlights, topping off oil in the forks, last minute bolt tightening.
DUKE wanders through.
DUKE (V/O) The racers were ready at dawn. Very tense. But the race didn’t start until nine so we had three long hours to kill.
A sign by a long trestle table: “KOFFEE & DONUTS.” DUKE walks past — ignoring the SMILING LADY behind the stall.
DUKE (V/O CONT’D) Those of us who had been up all night were in no mood for coffee and donuts. We wanted strong drink. We were, after all, the Absolute Cream of the National Sporting Press and we were gathered here, in Las Vegas, for a very special assignment. And when it comes to things like this you don’t fool around.
INT. RACE BAR TENT – DAY
A real pit of iniquity. Slot Machines. Crap tables. Smoke. Drunken shouting. The absolute cream of the NATIONAL SPORTING PRESS.
DUKE is at the bar, engaged in drunken conversation with a LIFE REPORTER…showing him his notebook.
DUKE See…”Kill the body and the head will die”… the Frazier/Ali fight…
MAGAZINE REPORTER A proper end to the 60’s… Ali beaten by a human hamburger!
DUKE And both Kennedy’s murdered by mutants. 24.
A SHOUT goes up from outside. The sound of engines revving.
REPORTER That’s it! They’re starting!
In a sudden rush the PRESS CROWD make for the door taking DUKE with them.
