Chocolat
Anouska What do you see?
Luc I see teeth. I see blood… and a skull.
Vianne Very dark. Bitter chocolate. That’s your favourite.
Mme Clairmont Ah, which will have to wait five weeks more. Lent. Thank you.
Vianne Oh.
Mme Clairmont We must run along. It’s been nice to meet you. Come.
Vianne My pleasure.
Anouska Pantoufle, come on! Pirate attack!
Mme Marceau How much are those… chili things, please?
Vianne Four-fifty a box.
Mme Marceau Could you put a ribbon on it?
Vianne Mm-hmm.
Mme Marceau Then I can pretend they are for my husband.
Vianne Of course.
Mme Marceau Josephine Muscat. She waltzes to her own tune.
Vianne And these… are for your husband. Unrefined cocoa nips from Guatemala… to awaken the passions.
Mme Marceau You’ve obviously never met my husband.
Vianne Well, you’ve obviously never tried these.
Mme Marceau Don’t be pathetic.
Mme Clairmont Luc, you’ve got a tiny error in problem six. Oh, Luc.
Luc It’s nothing. It already stopped. Mother… the new teacher… wants us to correct our own mistakes.
Mme Clairmont I didn’t tell you how to correct the mistake, I just told you that you made one.
Mme Rivet Not hungry, Monsieur le Comte?
Comte de Reynaud The Lenten fast, Madame Rivet.
Mme Rivet Are you not supposed to eat something?
Comte de Reynaud It’s all right. Leave it.
Josephine (Mumbling to herself)
Vianne Hello. May I help you?
Josephine It’s expensive. I don’t waste money.
Vianne I have a knack for guessing people’s favourites. These are your favourites. Am I right? On the house.
Josephine I think I’d better… (Mumbles to herself).
Mme Audel Well.
Old Woman 2 This is certainly different.
Old Woman 3 Yes. Very different.
Mme Audel Look at that. Oh!
Monsieur Blerot Oh. I’m so sorry.
Mme Audel Bonjour, Monsieur Blerot.
Monsieur Blerot Bonjour, Madame Audel. No, not that way, Charly. Come on.
Vianne Come in! Please. Come on, boy. I’ve got something for you. What’s your name?
Monsieur Blerot Charly. He’s fourteen years old. That’s ninety-eight in human years.
Vianne No, I meant your name.
Monsieur Blerot Er, oh! Guillaume Blerot. You’re very kind. He has so few pleasures left.
Vianne Er, would you care… Would you care to buy… something special, for your lady friend?
Monsieur Blerot Lady friend?
Vianne Uh-uh. The lovely woman your dog was so fond of. Her favourite is chocolate seashells. That’s my guess.
Monsieur Blerot Oh, no. I mustn’t. Madame Audel is in mourning for her husband.
Vianne Oh, I’m sorry. When, when did he pass away?
Monsieur Blerot The war. German grenade.
Vianne Well, it’s been fifteen years since the war, so surely…
Monsieur Blerot Not that war. Monsieur Audel was killed on January the twelfth, nineteen-seventeen. It was quite a blow to Madame Audel.
Vianne Apparently so.
Comte de Reynaud Bonjour, Mesdames.
Ladies Bonjour, Monsieur le Comte.
Comte de Reynaud I wish all my tenants were as reliable as you, Madame Drou.
Mme Drou How is the Comtesse enjoying Italy?
Comte de Reynaud Uh… She may be extending her trip.
Mme Drou Ah, very nice.
Comte de Reynaud Have either of you seen the new shop across the square?
Mme Audel Oh, the chocolaterie? Yes.
Comte de Reynaud Shameless, isn’t it? The sheer nerve of the woman… opening a chocolaterie just in time for Lent. The woman is brazen. My heart goes out to that, poor, illegitimate child of hers. Bonjour.
Pere Henri You ain’t nothin’ but a hound dog, Cryin’ all the time, You ain’t nothin’ but a hound dog, Cryin’ all the time, Well you ain’t never caught no rabbit, You ain’t no friend of mine. Yeah.
Comte de Reynaud A new addition to the liturgy?
Pere Henri I have a weakness for American music Monsieur le Comte.
Comte de Reynaud How long have you been with us Pere Henri?
Pere Henri It will be, er, five weeks.
Comte de Reynaud Your predecessor, Pere Michel, he was with us for… five decades.
Pere Henri Yes, well… I only pray I can live up to Pere Michel’s example.
Comte de Reynaud Yes, that’s my prayer also. I looked at your sermon, as you requested. I’ve made one or two notes.
Pere Henri You’re very kind.
Comte de Reynaud Not at all. Oh, er, one more thing. If you haven’t seen the new chocolaterie, perhaps you might like to take a look. It’s important to know one’s enemy. Don’t you think?
Vianne Hey, where’s my kiss?
Armande Watch where you’re going!
Anouska Excuse me!
Vianne Hello. Morning.
Armande What’s the décor… Early Mexican Brothel? Huh? No! If I need help, I’ll ask for it.
Vianne What do you see in it?
Armande Not a damn thing.
Vianne Come on. It’s a game. What do you see?
Armande I see a cranky old woman too tired to play games.
Vianne Hmm. I’ve got just the thing for you.
Armande That little girl of yours, does she mind it?
Vianne Mind what?
Armande The way you move her from place to place.
Vianne Oh. She’s doing fine. I think it’s good for her. You know, seeing new places, meeting new people.
Armande Your cinnamon looks rancid.
Vianne Well, it’s not cinnamon. It’s a special kind of chili pepper.
Armande Chili pepper in hot chocolate?
Vianne Mm-hmm. It’ll give you a lift. There.
Armande It tastes like… I don’t know.
Children Hop, hop, hop, hop! Where’s your kangaroo? Hop, hop, hop! I’m your kangaroo now!
