Cry Baby

Transcript written by and used with the courtesey of Angela Sugden

Mr Malnorowski
Get your cigarettes. Penny a piece. Six for a nickel.


Mrs Malnorowski
You owe me from yesterday, young man.


Student
Please, look, I’ll pay you tomorrow.


Mrs Malnorowski
Wouldn’t you like to have one?


Student
Oh, come on, just a drag. Just a drag!


Mrs Malnorowski
No cash, no tobacco. Go on, scram. Hey, Mona! Get over here and help your poor mother.


Mrs Woodward
Hi, kids. Remember, always look both ways before crossing.


Wanda
Mother!


Mrs Woodward
We’re having your favourite supper tonight, Wanda. Potatoes au gratin. Now walk. Look left, look right.
That’s right, then walk. Good teenagers.


Milton
Are you gonna work this summer?


Mr Woodward
Wanda, honey. You want a ride home with Dad?


Wanda
I got a lift. Thanks, anyway.


Mr Woodward
We could count out-of-state licence plates. I saw one this morning all the way up from Virginia.


Wanda
Dad, would you just leave me alone?


Mr Woodward
Bye, honey.


Allison
I’m so tired of being good. Hi.


Cry-Baby
Well. You’re a pretty little Square. Wanna hang out with us Drapes tonight?


Mrs Vernon Williams
Allison Vernon Williams, get in this car.


Baldwin
What’s the trouble, honey? These hoodlums bothering you?


Allison
No, no, we were just talking. Grandmother, Baldwin, this is Wade Walker.


Cry-Baby
They call me Cry-Baby. This here’s my sister, Pepper.


Pepper
Greetings, Granny-o.


Baldwin
Allison’s my girl, so hands off, Cry-Baby.


Cry-Baby
You could’ve fooled me, Square. Mrs Vernon Williams, I hear you’re having a talent show out at your charm school today.


Mrs Vernon Williams
I can barely imagine what you would call music.


Cry-Baby
I can sing pretty good.


Mrs Vernon Williams
Well”, not “good”. Haven’t you ever heard of the English language?


Pepper
Don’t go and flip out, mama.


Hatchet-Face
Yeah. Sometimes shook-up old ladies… get cut.


Baldwin
Come on, honey. They’re just bums.


Wanda
Mr Puniverse wants a fat lip.


Allison
I’d like to hear you sing.


Mrs Vernon Williams
I will say this once, and once only. Stay away from my granddaughter, you common juvenile delinquents.


Allison
It was nice talking to you all.


Cry-Baby
Let’s go.


Mrs Vernon Williams
The prettiest and most talented girl in school, and yet she socializes with Drapes.


Baldwin
We’re Squares, Allison, and Squares got to stick together.


Allison
Yeah, but Drapes are people too, they just look different. Maybe Cry-Baby can sing. Something cool, something hep.


Mrs Vernon Williams
And where did you learn those vulgar jazz words? Your poor dead parents would turn over in their graves.


Baldwin
It’s those jukebox records she listens to. Honey, his kind of music isn’t even on the Hit Parade.


Allison
How can I think when you’re always touching me?


Mrs Vernon Williams
I have told you, Baldwin, a young lady does not like to be pawed.


Cry-Baby & Wanda (singing)
The women want a Cadillac, She don’t want no man, I used to have a woman, Said she loved me so, I used to
have a woman, Said she loved me so…


Pepper
I think Cry-Baby’s got a girlfriend.


Milton
Cry-Baby and Allison sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.


Cry-Baby
Shut up, Milton.


Wanda
Hey, Hatchet-Face, you think Cry-Baby’s got blue balls for the chick?


Hatchet-Face
Allison’s a Square, Wanda. Cry-Baby don’t dig Squares.


Pepper
No, she’s a “Scrape”. Part Square, part Drape. I think she’s pretty.


Wanda
Cry-Baby want some hooch?


Cry-Baby
I don’t drink and drive.


Mrs Vernon Williams
You’re too young to know the shameful truth about the Walker boy’s family. But let me warn you, evil is in his blood.


Cry-Baby, Pepper, Wanda, Milton & Hatchet-Face (singing)
Oh, please, listen to me…


Baldwin
Move up, now.


Mrs Vernon Williams
That’s not funny.


Cry-Baby (singing)
Why I love that girl, love that girl. Hold me, baby, squeeze me. Never let me go. I’m not taking chances…


Baldwin
You’re a dead man, Walker.


Cry-Baby, Pepper, Wanda, Milton & Hatchet-Face (singing)
Oh, gee. Yes, I love her.


Baldwin
Car!


Cry-Baby (singing)
…why I love that girl.


Mrs Vernon Williams
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen… and welcome to the annual RSVP Talent Show.


Audience
Good afternoon, Mrs Vernon Williams.


Mrs Vernon Williams
First I must apologise for my frazzled nerves. However, this afternoon we were attacked… by a gang of juvenile delinquents.
It’s all right. No one was injured. Juvenile delinquents are everywhere. Right here in this community. Boys with long hair
and tattoos, who spit on the sidewalk.


Old Woman
Can’t believe it.


Woman
How disgusting.


Mrs Vernon Williams
Girls, who wear tight slacks. Hysterectomy pants, I call them. And if one of these creatures ever approach you on the street,
you are to silently repeat to yourself the four “B’s” you learned here at RSVP. And what are they children, the four “B’s”?


Audience
Beauty, brains, breeding, bounty!


Mrs Vernon Williams
Yes! Yes!


Mr Hackett
Teenagers everywhere repent! Let Jesus Christ be your gang leader! Get out of Turkey Point before it’s too late.


Toe-Joe
Oh, take it easy, honey. I’m not getting any younger here, you know. That is what I call a really great shape. Knockers up,
sweetheart. Here it is! Beautiful. All right, here you go, honey pot. Thanks for the picture. All right, who’s up? Toe-Joe
Jackson’s art photography right here! Be a nudie-cutie, make good money to bootie. Hey, I’m paying three bucks a shot. You
got it, what the hell, why not show it, right? Hey, you. Yeah, you, the looker with the class-A sealed-beam headlights. You
want to pose for Toe-Joe?


Wanda
Beat it, creep.


Here he comes now, with that devil woman.


Hatchet-Face
Hi, Mrs Hackett.


Mr Hackett
Imagine our shame. Our only child, and he carries illegal weapons, drives fast cars, and wears clothes obviously designed by
homosexuals. But he knows better. Jesus is still in his heart.


Milton
Jeez, Mom and Dad, go home. You’re embarrassing me. I’m a teenager. I wanna live. Looks like somebody lost their laundry.


Lenora
Hello, Cry-Baby. You scorch me, man.


Cry-Baby
Later, Lenora.


Lenora
Oh, but, Cry-Baby, I need a date for tonight’s Jukebox Jamboree.


Cry-Baby
Well, I’m solo, sugar.


Lenora
Wanna see these gun-boats? I give, Cry-Baby. I give bare second on the first date.


Cry-Baby
Use your mentality and cool down.


Wanda
Yeah, Lenora, your bosoms ain’t nothing.


Hatchet-Face
Better watch it, bozo. You might catch a cold.


Pepper
My brother wouldn’t touch your titties with a ten foot pole. He likes his women bad, Lenora, not cheap.


Baldwin (singing)
Life could be a dream. If I could take you up in paradise up above. If you would tell me, I’m the only one that you love.
Life could be a dream, sweetheart.


Whiffles (singing)
Hello, hello again. Sh boom, I’m hoping we’ll meet again.


Baldwin (singing)
Oh, life could be a dream. If only all my precious plans would come true. If you would let me spend my whole life loving you.
Life could be a dream, sweetheart.


Baldwin & Whiffles (singing)
Sh boom, sh boom. Sh boom, sh boom. Sh boom, sh boom. Sh boom. Now, every time I look at you. Something is on my mind. If
you’d do what I want to you. Baby, we’d be so fine. Oh, life could be a dream. If I could take you up in paradise up above.
If you would tell me I’m the only one that you love.


Baldwin (singing)
Life could be a dream, sweetheart.


Baldwin & Whiffles (singing)
Hello, hello again. Sh boom, I’m hoping we’ll meet again. Sh boom, sh boom.


Baldwin (singing)
Life could be a dream, sweetheart.


Cry-Baby
Uncle Belvedere!


Belvedere
You caught me in my birthday suit, buck-naked.


Pepper
Grandma, we’re home!


Dupree

How much?


Ramona
That muffler? Dupree, for you… fifteen bucks take it or leave it.


Dupree
Come on, Ramona. Ten. This thing’s hotter than a pistol.


Ramona
You guys wanna do business with Ramona Rickettes, or would you rather shop at Sears? Now, give me the bread and keep your trap shut!


Dupree
You’re a hard woman.


Ramona
I’m gonna see you in hell, Dupree. Go on, get outta here.


Pepper
Have you been bothering you great-grandma all day? She has customers.


Dupree
Hell, no. They helped me steal a car.


Snare-Drum
It’s a fifty-one Olds. It’s really cool.


Pepper
That’s my little Snare-Drum.


Susie-Q
And Ma, I swiped six hubcaps like a big girl.


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