JOHNNY-DEPP.org

Baldwin

Don’t do it, Allison. No!

Drapes

Too smart to work, too cool to care! Come to Turkey Point, man, if you dare! Too smart to work, too cool to care! Come to
Turkey Point, man, if you dare! Too smart to work…

Baldwin

Hey, let her go. She’s with me. Her name’s Allison and she’s a nice girl.

Cry-Baby

Allison, I’m sorry to get you locked up. But tonight… you were the coolest date I ever had.

Allison

But, Cry-Baby, who is that girl? Why didn’t you tell me you already had a lady friend?

Cry-Baby

Lenora ain’t nothing to me. I swear on my daddy’s grave. I’m burning inside to touch you, baby.

Press Man 1

How do you feel about your granddaughter becoming a Drapette?

Press Man 2

Mrs Vernon Williams, a picture, please.

Mrs Vernon Williams

Please, no pictures.

Hatchet-Face

Get your hands off me! Let go of me! Get your hands off me!

Judge

Order. Order in this courtroom. What a sad vision of today’s youth. The juvenile authorities have had it with Drape gangs.
Milton Hackett. Wanda Woodward. Mona Malnorowski, also known as Hatchet-Face. You are blights on this community. Are the parents here?

Mr Hackett

Yes, your Honour. We’ve been praying all night for our son.

Mrs Hackett

Praying so hard we’ve got headaches.

Mr Woodward

Hi, Wanda, honey.

Mrs Woodward

You were on the radio.

Wanda

Would you just get me the fuck outta here?

Mrs Woodward

What’s “fuck” mean, Hector?

Mr Woodward

Oh, Meg, it’s just a teen nonsense word Wanda uses to make herself feel all grown up.

Mrs Woodward

Your Honour, could we take Wanda the fuck home?

Judge

Good God! Order. Order in this courtroom.

Mr Hackett

You hear that, your Honour? It’s a sign. She’s speaking in tongues. God’s in her gullet. And he’s in yours, too.

Mrs Hackett

(Mumbles incoherently)

Mr Hackett

Let him out. Let the words of the Saviour be heard.

Mrs Hackett

(Mumbles incoherently)

Judge

Order! Order! No wonder your children are in trouble. And you, Miss Malnorowski… By the way, that’s a shame about your face.

Hatchet-Face

There’s nothing the matter with my face. I got character.

Judge

I see that your parents haven’t taken the trouble to come to get you.

Mr Malnorowski

Oh, yes, we did. You happy now, Mona? Huh? You finally did it. You put your own mother in an iron lung.

Judge

Mrs Malnorowski, there is no smoking in this courtroom.

Mrs Malnorowski

Why not? I pay taxes on cigarettes, don’t I? And what do I get for those taxes? Happiness? Hell, no. I get tuberculosis.
Oh, Christ! Now I got a flat tyre.

Judge

I am going to release these delinquents to their parents’ custody. And if they were mine… I’d give them a bare-asses whipping.

Ramona

Oh, they can sing, your Honour. You should hear ’em. Oh! It’s new, it’s exciting.

Belvedere

We don’t know what to call it. It sort of rocks, man, it, it spins.

Ramona

Yeah!

Belvedere

Nah, let me get the right words. It twirls. It twirls.

Judge

Ramona and Belvedere Rickettes, I find you guilty of disturbing the peace and I fine the both of you, one thousand dollars.

Ramona

But, that’s all we have.

Belvedere

How are we supposed to live?

Judge

Damn you. Handcuff those brats.

Pepper

Don’t touch my children!

Judge

And you, Pepper Walker… I’m going to have your two children put in the custody of the Chatterbox Orphanage, until they are adopted
by God-fearing parents who at least will give them Christian names.

Pepper

Not my children. They’re my flesh and blood.

Cry-Baby

She’s a good mother.

Pepper

They’re all I have!

Judge

Mrs Tadlock.

Pepper

Get away from them. You leave my kids alone!

Ramona

Don’t you touch them kids.

Mrs Tadlock

Come on.

Pepper

I love you, children.

Judge

Wade Walker, better known as Cry-Baby… What a sad and silly name for a young man. You were the ringleader in tonight’s gang war.

Allison

Grandmother, help him. We were just singing together.

Cry-Baby

Judge, let Allison go and I’ll take the full blame. I didn’t mean no harm, Mrs Vernon Williams. I may be a Drape, but I love your
granddaughter. And if that’s a crime, I’ll stand convicted… ma’am.

Mrs Vernon Williams

Your Honour, I am Allison’s grandmother. And, er, if Mr Walker does have a musical talent… I am willing to give him a second chance.
Won’t you? The boy is at least polite.

Judge

Mrs Vernon Williams… are you aware that Negroes were present at tonight’s disturbance?

Mrs Vernon Williams

My granddaughter is fond of all kinds of music.

Judge

I am going to release Allison this one time… because you are a fine and beautiful woman, Mrs Vernon Williams. But not you, Cry-Baby
Walker. The only place you’re going to sing is in jail.

Allison

No!

Judge

I find you guilty of rampant juvenile delinquency… and I hereby sentence you… to the Maryland Training School for Boys until your
twenty-first birthday.

Cry-Baby

Ha!

Judge

Court dismissed! Lock him up!

Ramona

You can’t lock up his music!

Cry-Baby

I’ll get out, sugar dumpling, I’ll get out if it’s the last thing I do! I swear!

Allison

Cry-Baby!

Lenora

Boy, do I have a story for you.

Press Man 1

How does it feel to be a juvenile delinquent?

Cry-Baby

It feels good. I’ve never been so happy in my whole life. Lenora you filthy hag. I wouldn’t let you shine my boots! Allison’s my
girl. A-L-L-I-S-O-N, fellows.

Press Man 2

When did he propose?

Lenora

Just last night. You see, I’m pregnant with his child. You know that Cry-Baby is an orphan. He wants his baby to have a real family…
for the family that he himself never had.

Inmates

(Arguing and Shouting)

Warder

Shut up! Shut up! Delinquents, hit the sack!

Inmate 1

I swear.

Warder

Strip down, asshole. It’s beddy-bye time. Now don’t for get to say your prayers. God bless my probation officer!

Inmates

God bless my probation officer.

Warder

God bless the draft board!

Inmates

God bless the draft board.

Warder

God bless the juvenile authorities!

Inmates

God bless the juvenile authorities.

Warder

We’re gonna give you a haircut tomorrow, pretty boy. You ever hear of a whiffle? Well, that’s what you’re gonna get, you big old
cry-baby, you. God bless Dwight Eisenhower!

Inmates

God bless Dwight Eisenhower.

Warder

God bless Roy Cohn!

Inmates

God bless Roy Cohn.

Warder

God bless Richard Nixon!

Inmates

God bless Richard Nixon.

Warder

Nighty-night, boys.

Allison

Cry-Baby.

Cry-Baby(singing)

Teardrops are falling. Teardrops are falling.

Inmates(singing)

Cry, go on, cry. Cry, go on, cry.

Cry-Baby(singing)

Teardrops are falling. Out my eyes. Teardrops are falling. I wonder why. Teardrops are falling. For you made me cry.

Dupree(singing)

Yes, teardrops are falling. Falling from my eyes. Yes, yes, yes. You made me cry. When you went away. You stayed away so long.
Come back, my dear.

Cry-Baby(singing)

My heart is aching. Almost breaking. If you hear me. Come back to me. Teardrops are falling. And you made me cry.

Inmates(singing)

Cry, don’t cry. Cry, don’t cry. Cry, don’t cry. Cry, don’t cry.

Mrs Vernon Williams

Oh, God.

Radio Announcer

Call these Drapettes bold, call them brazen, but whatever you do, don’t call them Square. Yes, mothers, you should be worried.
Following last night’s disturbance at Turkey Point, Cry-Baby Walker, convicted delinquent, had the nerve to announce his engagement
to fellow gang member and known hussy… Lenora Frigid, mother-to-be of his child.

Lenora

Cry-Baby is an orphan. And he wants his baby to have a real family… for the family that he himself never had.

Radio Announcer

Wade Walker, defiantly entering the Maryland Training School for Boys had this to say…

Cry-Baby

It feels good, man. I’ve never been so happy in my whole life.

Mrs Vernon Williams

Hurry, Allison, hide. The newspapers have blown this completely out of proportion.

Allison

He lied to me, grandmother. And the whole world knows I’m just a Drape fool.

Mrs Vernon Williams

Heavy hangs the head, that last night wore the crown. Allison.

Baldwin & Whiffles(singing)

The naughty lady of Shady Lane. Has hit the town like a bomb. The back-fence gossip ain’t been this good. Since Mabel ran off
with Tom. Our town was peaceful and quiet. Before she came on the scene. The lady has started a riot. Disturbing the suburban routine…

Mrs Vernon Williams

Allison Vernon Williams, you don’t have to decide today. Give your heart some time to think.

Baldwin & Whiffles(singing)

The naughty lady of Shady Lane. So delectable. Quite respectable. Me, oh, my, what a girl.

Baldwin

Allison, would you sing with me today?

Dupree

Hey, man, you old lady’s on the radio. There’s trouble, Cry-Baby, big trouble.

Cry-Baby

Allison!

Baldwin

There’s a new place that’s opening. It’s… sorta wild, kinda cool. It’s called a theme park and it’s the first in the state of Maryland.

Allison

I’d be proud to, Baldwin. Cry-Baby Walker, I hope you’re happy with Lenora. I only have one thing to say to you. I think
you’re a liar, and a cad… and I spit on your tears.

Baldwin

I can sing better than Cry-Baby Walker any day of the week.

Cry-Baby(singing)

Well, I ain’t here ‘cos I drive too fast. And I’m too young to have a criminal past. Some good behaviour would be all right.
But I don’t seem to qualify. I’m just out for a little fun. But I’m guilty till I’m twenty-one. I guess I’m doing time for being
young. So cut these shackles off of me.

Inmates(singing)

Let me go. Let me go.

Cry-Baby(singing)

This kind of suit don’t set me free.

Inmates(singing)

Set me free. Set me free.

Cry-Baby(singing)

Well, I can’t live if I can’t ride.

Inmates(singing)

Let me ride. Let me ride.

Cry-Baby(singing)

And I want my baby by my side.

Inmates(singing)

I want my baby by my side.

Cry-Baby(singing)

Yes, I’m just out for a little fun. But I’m guilty till I’m twenty-one. I guess I’m doing time for being young. Now, I can’t let
the right thing stand in my way. Someday, baby, I’ll know better. But right now I’m making them pay. What do I do, who do I thank?

Inmates(singing)

What can I do? What can I do?

Cry-Baby(singing)

To get me out of this stinking tank.

Inmates(singing)

Stinking tank. Stinking tank.

Cry-Baby(singing)

It’s heartbreaking to be this age.

Inmates(singing)

Stuck in a cage. Stuck in a cage.

Cry-Baby(singing)

Locked in the prison of teenage rage.

Inmates(singing)

Stuck in a cage with a teenage rage.

Cry-Baby(singing)

Well, I was out for a little fun. I guess I’m guilty till I’m twenty-one. I must be doing time for being young.

Inmates(singing)

Stuck in a cage with a teenage rage.

Cry-Baby(singing)

I don’t want to be doing time for being young.

Wanda

Who the hell is this?

Mrs Woodward

This is Inga. She’s from Sweden. She’s an exchange student. And she’s going to be staying with us for a while.

Mr Woodward

Inga, this is our daughter, Wanda. Say hello.

Inga

Ja.

Wanda

I’m blowing this joint.

Mr Woodward

Look, Inga doesn’t understand English very well. Inga, say hello to Wanda.

Inga

Ja?

Mrs Woodward

Say hello to our daughter.

Inga

Ja.

Mr Woodward

Er, honey, why don’t you come over and sit down? Get to know one another. Look at all the wonderful presents she’s brought us
from her native land.

Mrs Woodward

Let’s all put on a folk hat and learn something about a foreign culture.

Mr Woodward

Do we have a surprise for you? Don’t we, Meg?

Mrs Woodward

We sure do. All this silly trouble you’ve been having lately… Wanda, honey, you’re going to Sweden, this afternoon at three o’clock.

Wanda

You mean you swapped me? For a milkmaid?

Mr Woodward

Oh, honey… Inga’s mater and pater will treat you just like one of the family. Ja, Inga?

Inga

Ja. Ja, ja.

Wanda

You want to learn about America, Inga? In America, we like boys. We like hot boys. Boys with roaming hands and rushing fingers.