The Queen plops down on a settee held up by SPIDER MONKEYS who
strain and tremble under the weight. She kicks of f her shoes
and holds her legs up in the air.
RED QUEEN
I need a pig here!
A small pig hurries over and lays down belly up. She puts her
feet on his belly and sighs.
RED QUEEN (cont.)
I love a warm pig belly for my
aching feet. Would you like one,
Uum?
Alice perches on a small stool to avoid sitting on an animal.
Her knees are bent up almost to her chin.
ALICE
No, thank you.
RED QUEEN
Where are my Fatboys? You must
meet them! Fatboys!
Alice is shocked as the Tweedles are led into the parlor by a
Footfrog. Their faces have been painted and powdered with
hearts on their cheeks and red heart lips. They’re bound
together by a gold belt around their waists, like twin pets.
RED QUEEN (cont.)
There they are! Aren’t they adorable?
And they have the oddest way of
speaking. Speak boys. Amuse us.
They keep their eyes lowered, downtrodden and silent. The
Queen kicks Tweedledum.
RED QUEEN (cont.)
Speak!
Dum lifts his eyes and sees Alice. He nudges Dee.
TWEEDLEDUM
Is that being…?
White Rabbit frowns and gives a tiny shake of his head, not to
let on.
TWEEDLEDEE
No, it isn’t. Not a bit.
But Dum didn’t notice the Rabbit’s admonition.
TWEEDLEDUM
Contrariwise, I believe it is so…
TWEEDLEDEE
No! It ain’t so. Nohow!
He stomps on Dum’s foot to make his shut up. Dum pinches him.
Dee pinches him back and so on. The Queen laughs raucously.
RED QUEEN
I love my Fatboys.
One of spider monkeys can’t hold the settee anymore. He drops
his end. The Queen crashes to the floor.
RED QUEEN
Of f with their heads!
The Monkeys screech and run around. The Footfrogs attempt to
catch them. It’s chaos. Alice laughs nonchalantly.
ALICE
You don’t mean that.
Everything stops. The monkeys stop screeching. The Footfrogs
stop chasing them. No one dares move. The Queen turns slowly
to fix Alice with a dark glare.
RED QUEEN
Did you say something?
ALICE
You can’t have the poor things
executed because they couldn’t bear
your weight. It’s just…silly.
RED QUEEN
I’m going to forgive you this
time because you’re a big clumsy
girl from Umbradge and you don’t
know any better. But do not EVER
contradict your Queen!
(to the Rabbit)
Off with…
She trails off with a sideways glance at Alice.
RED QUEEN (cont.)
These useless monkeys. Send me
something stronger. Send me
chimpanzees.
The door opens and all the monkeys run out with grateful
looks
at Alice. Ilosovic Stayn enters. The Queen lights up to see
him.
RED QUEEN (cont.)
Stayn! How lovely to see you.
KNAVE OF HEARTS
Maj esty.
RED QUEEN
This is my possible new favorite.
He barely nods to Alice.
KNAVE OF HEARTS
I need to speak with you regarding
the prisoner.
RED QUEEN
Leave us!
Alice unfolds herself off the stool. As she stands up, Stayn’s
eyes follow her with sudden interest.
KNAVE OF HEARTS
Who did you say this is?
RED QUEEN
tjurn.
ALICE
From Umbradge.
Stayn takes Alice’s hand.
KNAVE OF HEARTS
Ilosovic Stayn, at your service.
ALICE
Pleasure.
KNAVE OF HEARTS
The pleasure is all mine.
He holds her hand a little too long. Alice gets the willies.
She pulls her hand away and wipes it surreptiously on her
dress.
RED QUEEN
Go away now.
Stayn watches Alice lasciviously as she goes out.
EXT. THE HALL – CONT.
The Tweedles are delighted to see Alice again.
TWEEDLEDEE
Alice! Howdoyedo again.
They shakes her hands vigorously.
TWEEDLEDEE
How is it you’re being so great
big?
TWEEDLEDEE
She ain’t great big. This is how
she normal is.
TWEEDLEDUM
I’m certain she is smaller
when we met.
TWEEDLEDEE
She had drank the pishsa]ver,
to get through the door, recall
it?
ALICE
Shhh.
She listens at the door.
KNAVE OF HEARTS (O.S.)
I have tried every form of
persuasion.
INT. THE PARLOR – CONT.
RED QUEEN
Are you certain he knows where
she is?
KNAVE OF HEARTS
He knows. He taunts me with his
eyes, even as I subject him to
unbearable pain.
I-fe squeezes his large hands in frustration as if choking the
life out of the Hatter. The Queen sinks into self-pity.
RED QUEEN
I know the commoners don’t love me
the way they loved my sister.
KNAVE OF HEARTS
They do.
RED QUEEN
Don’t lie!
KNAVE OF HEARTS
They do not. Eut isn’t it far
better to be feared than loved?
RED QUEEN
No doubt. But without the
Jabberwocky to keep the rabble
in line, they would surely rise
against me. You must not allow
Alice to kill my best weapon.
KNAVE OF HEARTS
I have pushed the Hatter to the
brink and still I cannot break him.
RED QUEEN
Then take off his head. We’ll
see if he talks then.
He looks at her strangely. She laughs at her joke, sees his
look.
RED QUEEN (cont.)
You thought I was serious.
KNAVE OF HEARTS
(caught)
I didn’t, not at all. If nothing
else, his execution will serve as
an example to the White Loyalists.
INT. THE HALLWAY – CONT.
ALICE
They’re going to kill the
Hatter.
TWEEDLEDEE
No, they ain’t!
TWEEDLEDUM
Nohow.
TWEEDLEDUM
We’ll fight ’em!
Alice turns to the Rabbit urgently.
ALICE
Take me to him.
WHITE RABBIT
It’s not that simple to stroll
into the dungeon with a seven
foot girl…
