Apr
1
2025
Of course this was our 2025 April fools joke, thanks to Grok for the help:
In a bizarre twist straight out of a Hollywood script, Disney has reportedly unleashed a herd of 1,000,001 alpacas onto the streets of Los Angeles in a desperate bid to woo Johnny Depp back for Pirates of the Caribbean 6. The move comes after Depp famously quipped that he wouldn’t return to the franchise even if Disney offered him “a million alpacas and $300 million.”
Apparently taking the statement as a challenge, Disney decided to up the ante—literally—by adding one extra alpaca to the million-strong herd. Eyewitnesses report that the fluffy invaders have taken over Sunset Boulevard, causing traffic jams, confused tourists, and a sudden spike in alpaca selfies across social media. “I thought it was a movie stunt at first,” said local resident Maria Gonzalez, “but then one spit at me, and I knew it was real.”
A supposed leaked memo from Disney execs claims this was their “grand gesture” to prove their commitment to Depp’s return as Captain Jack Sparrow. “We heard Johnny loud and clear,” an anonymous source allegedly said. “He said a million wouldn’t do it, so we sent 1,000,001. How can he say no now?”
Depp’s representatives have yet to comment,
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